Thursday, May 22, 2008

The Secular World Recognizes Porn Addiction?

For whatever reason, a Fox News' website is usually fairly smutty. One regular foxnews.com contributor that sells the usual load of secular lies and offenses to God is "Sexpert" Dr. Yvonne Fulbright. She's the author of Touch Me There! A Hands-On Guide to Your Orgasmic Hot Spots (I'm sure you keep a copy next to your Bible and Catechism, right?). Fulbright recently tackled the idea that pornography addiction is a legitimate addiction. Thankfully, this is one of the few occasions where Dr. Fulbright is correct, as she does indeed promote the idea that a pornography addiction is real. She even lists seven signals that you could be addicted to pornography. For the most part, these are on target, although it seems to promote the idea that one can only tell if they are addicted to pornography if they have a current sexual partner. Naturally, I disagree. What about the single people out there who are saving themselves for marriage? What about those who have taken a vow of celibacy? We'll be tackling this subject more closely at a later date.

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,357323,00.html:

1. You’ve become anti-social - You are spending more time with pornography than you are with the outside world. If you are single (and even if you are putting yourself out there) your preoccupation with porn may be hindering your ability to establish long-term, monogamous relationships. If you are involved with someone, you may find yourself bowing out of couple and familial obligations to steal moments with your laptop or DVD player. Bottom line: You only have eyes for porn stars and no one else.

2. You’re lying to your partner - Your once honest relationship is now plagued by secrecy and dishonesty as you try to hide your porn habit. About 70 percent of people keep their porn use a secret. And many will go to all sorts of extremes in making sure that they are not found out. Even when busted, many will do or say anything to hide the truth.

3. Your partner is no longer attractive - Unbeknownst to your partner, s/he has competition – and it’s your favorite porn star. Obsessed with fantasy characters, you find it hard to get turned on to the real thing, including yourself. That’s right; you’re not even letting yourself off the hook. Casting yourself against fiction, you’re sizing yourself up as unattractive. Either way, you are likely avoiding or completely uninterested in sex with your lover.

4. Your sex life with your partner is suffering - Both your sexual desire and functioning, including arousal, have taken a nose dive. You and your lover are feeling robbed of romance, passion and emotional closeness. This is because you are not truly present with your partner. Emotionally distant, you are too busy having sex with porn. Ultimately, you are dissatisfied with your actual sex life, and this is affecting your relationship.

5. Your concept of “real intimacy” has become warped - When you re-emerge from the fantasy world, you’re finding that your expectations about sex, sexual partners and intimacy have become unrealistic. You’re only interested in those who look and act like porn stars (which severely limit your dating pool if single). Sadly, you start to think there must be something “wrong” your lover for not putting out like a porn star. Furthermore, you’re objectifying others, wondering what he or she would look like unclothed or how they would act during sex.

6. The habit is causing you distress - Torn between desire and shame, your use of porn is causing you physiological and emotional distress. You may feel like a “sex pervert,” or suffer from isolation, shame, anger, unrest, depression and irritability. You may be distressed over the fact that using porn conflicts with your value system. Overall, your porn kink is starting to cause family, work, legal and/or spiritual problems.

7. You are engaging in risky behaviors - You might be OK with ideas that usually make you think twice, for instance, having unprotected sex, but now you are engaging in behavior that is out of control. Soliciting a prostitute, looking at child pornography or anything involving animals or violence warrants a need for help.


4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I think those who think it is a sin to have sex outside of marriage are biased against porn.

Matthew said...

Naturally, and with good reason.

Debbie said...

Great site. I am starting a website for activists to fight pornography calles The STOPsite (Students and Society To Oppose Pornography. Can I use your link?

Barry said...

I have had a porn /cd(crossdressing) addiction for years and all those steps pertain to me and they are a horrifying expierence the only time I love it is when my "alien ego state takes me over. Most of the time I am just danming myself to hell with my abuse of 'free will" I am very sad because I do not want to be seperated from the Lord and his Kingdom yet I keep on doing this!! and the internet makes it so easy.Yet I need my computer for business. I have gone to counseling for years tried SA groups and attend confession a million times. I still beleive that there is hope and I won't give up!! any advice?? Thanks